God Does Not Work That Way!

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Since the dawn of man, people have looked for ways to explain their world. Comets were once thought to be bad omens. To have a mental illness or epilepsy meant you were possessed by demons. A bad harvest meant that the goddess, Demeter, was displeased with you. The creation of the Earth was, (and still is, for some people) explained by a poem written around the 6th century BC. And today, people explain illness and tragedy as God’s will. When people can’t explain why a child died, they say, We can’t understand the mind of God. If people are suffering, whether with a chronic illness or becoming overwhelmed by life, others will try to comfort them with, God will never give you more than you can handle. When that doesn’t ring true, they add on “without Him”. Some proclaim that God allows you to suffer because your faith is great, so you may be an example to others, like Job. The flip side of that is that you haven’t been healed because you haven’t prayed enough or your faith is too weak.

YOUR LOVE IS LIKE BAD THEOLOGY
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We’re going to assume, for the same of argument, that Jesus was/is who He said He was/is. The Son of God traveled, not only preaching the Good News, but also healing the sick and raising the dead. I can certainly understand why people may glean from the Gospels the idea that God allows people to suffer.

As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”
“Neither this man nor his parents have sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life. As long as it is day, we must do the work of him who sent me. Night is coming, when no one can work.”
John 9:1-4 NIV

I think plenty of people stop at verse 3 and hold it up as proof that God made or allowed this man to be blind so that God may be magnified and glorified. They completely miss the actual point, which is to do God’s work by helping others. Add on verses where Jesus asks people who are asking for healing whether or not they believe in Him, and it’s no wonder where this suffering theology comes from. But I find it telling that, while Jesus may have asked people if they believed, (and for all we know, it could have been something the disciples slid in there while writing the Gospels) He didn’t make them go through a checklist or faithfulness song and dance to prove themselves before healing them. In one case, Jesus found it more important to forgive a man’s sins, rather than physically heal him. It was only after the Pharisees pitched a fit did Jesus add in healing the man’s paralysis, just to shut them up with a resounding So’s your face! (I may be paraphrasing.)

Sometimes I think we forget and only look at the words of Jesus. We forget that His actions are every bit as important. Jesus healed the sick. When someone asked Him for healing, He didn’t say, Nah. Imma sit this one out. But you can head on out from your leper colony and tell everyone how awesome I am. Hosanna, y’all! To claim that God only heals those who call upon His name and are deemed worthy enough is to call God a capricious asshole. It completely contradicts what we see in God through Jesus. What is revealed is a loving God who mourns with us. We don’t see a God who brings suffering. And we certainly don’t see a God who’s concerned about getting credit for good works. (“Go and tell no one…”)

I think, too often, we are like the Pharisees. When we don’t understand or something doesn’t fit in nicely with our worldview, we cling to what we know, (or what we think we know.) Sayings and beliefs, and even superstitions, are passed down from generation to generation. When we use them to explain things in our human experience, we are looking to our own understanding, (and explaining it as God) rather than to what Jesus actually showed us long ago.

He replied, “Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you hypocrites; as it is written:
‘Theses people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me.
They worship me in vain; their teachings are but rules taught by men.'”
“You have let go of the commands of God and are holding on to the traditions of men.”
Mark 7:6-8 NIV

STOP IT! YOU’RE NOT HELPING!
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Image source

Phrases like, “God will never give you more than you can handle,” has made me want to reach through the computer and shake people many a time. (Especially when it’s thrown out flippantly when someone is clearly suffering.) This time, I was set off by the “helpful” comments that people in my chronic pain support group shared. All of these were things that were said to them about why they are made to suffer.

Jesus suffered pain so others would not suffer much more in hell. Your suffering makes you like Jesus, and it draws you closer to Him.

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(An ability to create a massive fish fry out of two fish and to form my liquid metal body into anything I want would also make me like Jesus, but you don’t see that happening. Or was that T-1000?)

I was once told by a Christian therapist that God wouldn’t heal me [be]cause I made him mad.

(So He took his toys and went home, or…?)

Our church said that our family [was] suffering with many illnesses so that the rest of the town doesn’t have to suffer.

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(John Coffey? Is that you?)

Look…those of us with chronic pain and illnesses appreciate your concern and support. But, like most people, we just want to vent or have a shoulder to cry on. Some things are just shitty, horrible, and unfair. Trying to have a simple, pseudo-spiritual answer to make sense out of something that doesn’t make sense isn’t helpful. And think about this: how many peoples’ faith are you possibly destroying by saying such things? When people have suffered for years without relief, saying these things leads people to the logical conclusions that they, 1) Aren’t good enough for God, 2) That God doesn’t care about their suffering, 3) That God is oblivious to their needs and tribulations, and 4) God is a capricious jerk with sadistic tendencies. And this is assuming that they don’t give up belief in a god altogether.

Please, just tell us I’m sorry, or That sucks, or What can I do to help? Those go a long way. If you want to pray for us and healing, that’s great. But also pray for our families who suffer with us, for comfort, hope, and strength. Because, as Jesus so often pointed out, the non-physical is just as important. Just be there for us. SHOW us you care.

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5 thoughts on “God Does Not Work That Way!

  1. I’m so tired of that “God won’t give me more than you can handle” and “God will provide for your needs” bullshit. Really?! Money doesn’t magically appear in my bank account because I believe in God and need it. When I’m three seconds away from a nervous break down God doesn’t go “whoops I guess that was too much” and take away all my burdens.

  2. Really well said. I do wish people would prayerfully consider their words before offering their opinion or “comfort”. Better yet, most times it seems best to get to know a person and come along side them in their pain, whatever it might be, before commenting at all, other than to use words of support, as you indicated, “How can I help?”

    I suspect most people have a high tolerance for other people’s pain until they have experienced something at least somewhat similar that helps them understand the functional issues of chronic pain. Until such an event occurs most people are generally miserable comforters because they simply have not fully understood your pain.

    I am certain of this, we live in a broken world where there is pain. People are broken physically, mentally and spiritually. Sometimes the brokenness is due to their own poor decisions, sometimes because things have been done to them that is not their fault and sometimes because this is the world we live in where our bodies get sick and are sometimes diseased this side of heaven. I am also absolutely certain that the God who created our bodies loves each of us unconditionally and cares deeply about our pain and never offers flip or unmeaningful responses. It is common that people look to sources outside themselves when life highlights their brokenness, such as with a serious illness, disease or other crisis. While Christ is always there to meet us when we are ready to ask for his help, such as with healing our body. However, it is not His highest purpose above all else, that our bodies are healthy and whole. While He does not create pain or suffering, He can use any situation in our lives to help us see our ultimate dependence on Him for all of life. There are those whose lives speak to the fact that the suffering they experienced in their body was the catalyst to them understanding that God loved them and that he had a higher purpose for lives above that of a healthy, whole body. Sometimes God does heal bodies in extraordinary ways too; but, the larger message, as you pointed out so well, is that he cares for people. He does not want for us to suffer but he does want to be in relationship with us as we navigate this broken world. I will say from experience that suffering in general causes us to grow as persons more than one more season of comfort could ever do as long as the suffering is not for no good reason. A double negative in that sentence but I leave it as it stands, grammatical error and all.

    So not everyone is healed in the same way. God is way too dynamic in the way he interacts with His creation for us to box Him in with our ideas of who he is and what He can do in lives.

    Carol L.

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